Without fail the cold and flu season comes every year. I usually get off pretty easy and don’t fall victim. But my morning commute is really challenging my immunity to the season.

Every day I am trapped in a box crawling with should-have-called-in-sick-days. I spend almost an hour of my day a sneeze and cough length distance away from a potentially crummy forecast. The subway lines are starting to sound like flu strands to me. I’m at risk for the influenza 6 or 5 subtype N.

The soundtrack of the morning subway is full of sniffs, snorts, coughs, and other mucus filled noises. Amidst the sounds of the season, I can hear the subway alert, “a crowded subway is no defense to unlawful sexual conduct” and all I can think is that they should add “in addition, a crowded subway is no justification for the thoughtless spreading of germs.” This constant and unsolicited negligence is a constant harassment from my fellow subway goers.

I don’t know why some people (prominently older women) think it is sanitary to use the same tissue all day. I’m pretty sure tissues, much like toilet paper, are not reusable and that’s why a box of tissues has hundreds of them. Those same women then use those same mangled tissues to hold the subway poles. I might as well wipe her nose for her with my bare hand. The subway poles are a great way  to grab some germs.

Although, I do sympathize with some of the sufferers. I know the absolute anguish of trying to hold in a persistent and vengeful cough. Your throat goes from a tickle to an itch, your eyes begin to water, your neck convulses, and then finally some god awful noise escapes that was way worse than the original tickle. I think if it’s coming out you might as well just let it. But I would prefer that you zip your head up in your coat to do so.

The subway is filled with all kinds of different “whatever is going around the office,” and I wonder how many different types of colds your body can acquire at once. I don’t ever want to be that cold. But I’m not sure that there is any way to escape all of them. I could wear these and go full swine-flu mask, but I’d rather stay home sick than be that girl. I normally enjoy my sick days most when I’m feeling great, but since I have to ride the subway, I better save them.